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I had a great time at the live taping of the Savage Lovecast at Chicago's Music Box Theatre.Audience members submitted questions on cards, and I tackled as many questions as I could over two hours—with the welcome and hilarious assistance of comedian Kristen Toomey.What about someone who doesn't want to have sex, ever?I've asked other people for advice, and the answer is usually "take one for the team," have sex to keep them happy.

Move on all fronts: Go places and do things—as much as your disability and budget allow—join gay dating sites, be open about your disability, be open to dating other disabled people.The healthiest loners shrug it off and don't search for mates, the complicit loners play along and go through the motions of searching for mates, and the oblivious loners make themselves and others miserable by searching for and landing mates they never wanted. As a trauma/rape survivor, I found myself attracted to girls afterward.My boyfriend keeps talking about how much he would like for me to peg him. Is this because I’m scared of men or am I genuinely attracted to girls? People react to trauma in all sorts of ways—some of them unpredictable.(I’m female.) Should I wait for him to buy a contraption or surprise him myself? Traditionally, straight couples exchange strap-on dildos to mark their six-month anniversary. What’s the best timing—relative to meals and bowel movements—to have anal sex? How can you find kinky folks who aren’t super pervy? And trauma has the power to unlock truths or obscure them.Butts shouldn’t be fucked too soon after a meal or too soon before a bowel movement. Jack Morin's Anal Pleasure and Health: A Guide for Men, Women, and Couples—which can be read before, during, and after meals and/or bowel movements. They’re hanging out with the kinky folks who aren't super judgy. I'm sorry you were raped, and I would encourage you to explore these issues with a counselor.You have the right to say something—the First Amendment applies to relationships, too—but you have two additional rights and one responsibility: the right to refrain from reading the comments, the right to unfollow your partner's social-media accounts, and the responsibility to get over your jealousy. I’m worried that there may not be chemistry with her.A couple invited me to go on a trip as their third and to have threesomes. Is there anything I can do to build chemistry or at least get us all comfortable enough to jump into it?But you don't enjoy it—it makes you feel objectified in the wrong way.(Most of us, feminists included, enjoy being appreciated for our parts and our smarts.) Use your words: "I don't like it when you come on my chest.Tell him what you're gonna do ("I'm gonna suck that dick"), tell him what you're doing ("I'm sucking that dmmffhm"), tell him what you just did ("I sucked that dick"). By Pepper Schwartz Copyright © 2014 AARP All rights reserved.


  1. Advice for the asexual. You can also choose to identify as asexual—and search for other asexuals—on mainstream dating sites. Dan Savage advises a.

  2. Special Dating Strategies for Gays, Lesbians, and Bisexuals over 50; Special Dating Strategies for Gays, Lesbians. Gay sex expert and columnist Dan Savage has.

  3. There are lots of apps out there for couples seeking thirds, you can even advertise as a couple seeking a third on big dating sites like. More from Dan Savage.

  4. The Benefits of Sexual Communal Strength. GGG is a term coined by sex columnist Dan Savage to represent the. such as how technology influences dating

  5. And our 10 Best Dating Podcasts get the job. was created by Dan Savage in 1996. Savage covers every angle when it comes to dating, sex and love. Savage.

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